Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
