From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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