I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
this will be a night to untag.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
