well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
