And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
