i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
this hospital has no fireball
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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