with your own penis?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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