So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I think my moral compass just broke
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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