awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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