the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
