I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
