I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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