So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
