There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
