It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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