She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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