It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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