You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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