4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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