Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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