you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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