The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
