I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
