Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
