Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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