I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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