No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
