it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
All the doctor said was why
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
