Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Mom said you looked used
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Im part way to drunk.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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