Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
