We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
