He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
