People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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