I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
