i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
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