Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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