i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
