Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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