VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
and she was petting her beer can
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
