Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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