is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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