brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
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