Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
