Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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