Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
