there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
