Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
