We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize