remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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