And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
